I have exciting news!  This month I’m launching a fabulous new program called Decoding Dating.  It’s a monthly recorded series in which I interview other experts to give you more insight and savvy tips you need for dating success.  The first interview is with Terry Hernon MacDonald, author of  How to Marry the Man of Your Dreams. Terry knows the secrets to attraction and she used them to meet and marry her husband.

You don’t want to miss this opportunity. Listen to what Terry has to say and start attracting the man of your dreams right away.  Here’s a quick audio preview.

For just $14.97, you’ll get a CD with Terry’s interview filled with her juicy suggestions (or  the MP3 file via email at $11.97.)

Every month, you’ll get fascinating new strategies to help you decode dating from experts who know the score when you sign up. You’ll be billed each month as the recording is sent by regular mail or email– your choice.  Take advantage of all the knowledge that’s available to you and register for Decoding Dating today!  Sign up now to receive Terry’s interview.

Wishing You Love,

Ronnie

INSPIRATION: Horseshoe Crabs & The Natural Process of Finding a Mate
The other night I was walking along the beach in the moon light, just at the water’s edge and noticed a few odd bumps – that were moving!  Turns out this is the time of year that horseshoe crabs mate.  At first I thought – "Get a room!"  How silly – they’re just crabs doing something completely natural.

So how is it that we humans now encounter such difficulties in finding a good mate when it should be a completely natural process?  It’s starts with being single in mid-life, a time when we have grown accustomed to our own ways of doing things.  And we have baggage – love history from previous relationships gone wrong.  All this and many other factors contribute to a vast adult single population who is lonely and sometimes apathetic about even looking for love.

But let’s think back to the crabs.  For them, finding a mate seems so much simpler and easier.  How do horseshoe crabs find each other attractive?  Well they probably have far fewer "must haves" than we do.  Or maybe they’re just more open-minded.  Hard to say.  The question is – can we learn from our frisky friends?

I believe we can and here are four perspectives about dating and potential partners that might help loosen up some of the strict criteria that actually keeps people single.

1. Cut prospects some slack.  What if you relax and just try getting to know a few new people?  Often people will surprise you if you give them a chance.  Open up and allow a man or woman who is less than perfect into your world long enough to see if there is any merit, rather than shutting the door with a snap judgment.

2. When you see the opposite sex walking down the street, do you think critical thoughts or friendly thoughts?  Who knows why human nature usually resorts to critical thinking, but chances are strong your heart is not open to those you pass by when you are usually critical. (Sometimes this is appropriate, but not always.) Try letting go of some criticism, and imagine what might make that person who passes by a good catch?  Let your guard down a bit to make connecting more possible.

3. Think well of yourself.  It’s been said many times, if you want to be treated with respect, respect yourself first.  That’s good advice.  Take care of and treasure yourself.  Get a new hair cut, buy some new clothes, eat well, walk with good posture; head up and shoulders back.  Work on your self esteem to know you are worthy of love and a good relationship.  Someone would be darn lucky to have you!

4. Keep your expectations in check.  If one prospect doesn’t work out, move on!  The world is well populated with options for you, so don’t cry too long over the one who got away.  This is especially true when you’ve had a brief relationship or one that didn’t quite materialize.  Too often people get all tied up in just being rejected at first email contact on dating sites.  There are millions of people on those sites.  Move on to someone better!

Of course, I’m not sure, but I do think that the horseshoe crabs live and mate by these concepts.  (I’m not sure how much \ thinking crabs do, just go with it. Hey. Maybe that’s actually the best advice anyway.) Animals are naturally open to opportunities, think positively, know they are worthy and move on when rejected to find a better partner.  Give it a try and take advantage of this glorious weather and the best time of year to find your own mate.  Chances are very strong that you’ll be happy you did.

DATING BLOG:  Four Women Who are Not the Cast from Sex & the City
Do you read blogs?  I never have until last week.  I thought I’d find a lot of dating advice from other coaches like me.  Nope.  What I did find was a large number of sites written by one person, airing out the details of her romantic life (I only looked at the women).  Yeah, I kept a dating diary, but no one ever read it!  Am I dating myself so to speak? Chronologically of course – any other idea is just plain silly

These bloggers spill the beans openly; the nitty-gritty details of romance good or bad are there in cyber print for all to read!  The MySpace generation, which seems to be spanning more than a generation at this point, is verbal, vocal, tell all and not concerned much about privacy.  If you like reading real life gossip, trashy romance novel-like entries and have time on your hands – search and read a few of these blogs – it will be quite a trip!

www.justanotherman.blogspot.com

This one has been written by four women who have named themselves the antithesis of each Sex & the City character.  That’s right not Miranda, not Carrie, not Samantha and not Charlotte.  If you’re bored – visit and laugh – plenty of whining about  - you guessed it men in NYC.

Here are two more:

www.charmingbutsingle.com
www.grinsnadlaughter.com

I’m jumping on the blog band wagon too very soon, something to stay tuned for.  Until then, happy blogging!

GET OUT THERE: Boston and Else Where

OK, this looks like fun – a singles boomer kayak trip sponsored by the Boston Center for Adult Education (BCAE)  It’s Saturday, June 9^th on the Charles River so visit their site and sign up now!  www.BCAE.org

If you are a green lifestyle supporter, look into www.greenfriends.com  You’ll have similar values and preferences that’s for sure.

This is BBQ season.  Look in your newspaper’s calendar section or look online for singles event listing – even try Craig’s List to find these seasonal opportunities, find a friend and go!  BBQ = Best Boyfriends Quickly (Guys, I know you change this acronym to be gender specific yourselves)  Stop groaning and get going!

FEATURED RESOURCE: Save $25 on a Totally Customized Makeover

Meet my new friend Kristina Foreman, professional makeup artist. Her specialty? Totally Customized Makeovers.  Typically, makeup artists use standard products.  But Kristina customizes the entire process for your makeover.  She matches and custom-blends the foundation from the finest minerals and botanicals available today, as well as blush, lip gloss, eye shadow, etc.  She creates truly beautiful results for that special event or everyday wear..

Originally based in NY, now in CT, Kristina has been working in the beauty, fashion and bridal industries for over 20 years.  Her artistry has been published in Elle, Cosmopolitan, Bride, Martha Stewart Bride, Bridal Star, Seventeen, and many more.  Visit Kristina’s Studio by appointment – MakeupMakeup at 22 Broad Street in Milford, CT.  Contact 203-783-9096 or visit her web site www.makeupmakeup.com  Tell her Ronnie sent you!

 
COACHING OPTIONS – Biz, Love, Life?

To receive info about:

• Dating Coaching
• Online Dating Profile Review or Writing
• Bragging Coaching – The Fine Art of Personal PR
• Clarity Coaching
• Business and Marketing Coaching or
• Workshops

Email Ronnie@NeverTooLate.biz with the topic in the subject line.  And visit www.SuccessExpressCoaching.com and my biz blog http://ctsolop.wordpress.com

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Wouldn’t you enjoy a spring/summer romance? Imagine the fun of watching July 4th fireworks while your own sparks fly. You deserve to have the love you want!

This is the best time of the year to rev up your dating activity. You can find the love you want if you get started right now. Join this dynamic coaching group to get savvy tips, strategies and the support you need for a spring/summer love life to remember.

Start Dating Now – Group Coaching Program

Starts Sunday May 20^th, 8-9pm est.
Get all the details – call Ronnie at 203-877-3777 for more information today.

Wishing you Love,

Ronnie Ann Ryan, The Dating Coach

TELL ALL – News and Events

Start Dating Now – Group Coaching Program
Starts Sunday May 20^th, 8-9pm est.

Series includes:

1. Six 1-hour group coaching sessions
2. A copy of MANifesting Mr. Right
3. The MP3 file or CD of Top 10 Attitudes that Sabotage Dating Success
4. A quick review of your online dating profile

INSPIRATION: Moving on from the Mommy Syndrome

I broke up with Jack after nearly a year. I’ve told you there were problems, little things, annoyances, but I was trying to overlook small flaws and learn to be in a healthy relationship, communicate, etc. Nobody’s perfect and I tried to appreciate his many good points.

What finally triggered the end was that Jack seemed incapable of taking care of himself At 31, he still relies heavily on his mom, his housemate and me. I tried to break up several times, but always thought better of it and gave him another chance. 

Then last weekend we went away for four days and on day two, Jack told me he’d run out of money! When we got back, I broke up with him. I knew, I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone I didn’t respect.

Ronnie, I’m sure I did the right thing but I had no idea how much it would hurt! I thought I’d feel relieved. The bottom line is – this is a major loss and even though my friends and family have affirmed that I made the right decision, I’m shocked by how alone I feel, and how sad that I won’t see him again. Right now it’s hard to believe I’ll ever meet anyone else. 

I found a lot of strength to make this decision based on everything I’ve learned from you about the things I want in a partner and what I can’t accept. It frightens me that my list keeps getting longer – now I have to add financial stability and maturity.  Thanks again for all your help and inspiration, and please know that you’ve helped me through an incredibly difficult time.

Dear Chrissie

I want you to know how much I support your decision. There’s no point in being with a partner who can’t take care of himself – that’s like a long-term Mommy sentence. Relationships hopefully expand your world, not weigh it down.

I know how much a break up hurts. For some reason the right decisions are often the hardest.  Relationships require compromise, but when that compromise impacts your self-esteem or overall happiness, its important to draw the line. You did the right thing by moving on. That shows you know how to put your well being above all else. Good for you!

One thing I can tell you is that you got a tremendous amount out of this relationship. It’s hard to see right now, but with of time, you’ll look back and realize how much it opened your heart and gave you an opportunity to strengthen your relationship skills. While the list of qualities you want in a partner got longer, my bet is the important things stand out more clearly. 

Be kind to yourself and allow the healing to begin. It takes time of course and can’t be rushed. But you will recover, and I’m confident that you will also find love again. And know that your healing is as inevitable as finding a new and better-suited romance.

GET OUT THERE

I did a little digging to come up with some new dating activities in New England.

For a new speed dating group with an age range up to 55 – visithttp://www.amatchmadein7.com/Upcoming_events.htm

This site has all kinds of social groups to check out by state and city

Here’s a site new to me, that might be worth checking out

I found this site when I was Googling Boston Singles

www.se-4u.com Executive Singles Group

• Dating Coaching
• Online Dating Profile Review or Writing
• Bragging Coaching – The Fine Art of Personal PR
• Clarity Coaching
• Business and Marketing Coaching or
• Workshops

Email Ronnie@NeverTooLate.biz with the topic in the subject line. And visit www.SuccessExpressCoaching.com and my biz blog http://ctsolop.wordpress.com

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