Single this Valentine’s Day? Affirmations Work Better Than Chocolate

Welcome to day 5 of  the Valentine’s Day Blog-a-thon!

If you already know you won’t be getting any Valentine’s, read this post about a powerful method to turn things around!

Introducing today’s guest blogger Terry Hernon MacDonald. Terry is the happily married author of  How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams and writes regularly for Single Women Rule. For more tips about dating and relatinoships, visit her blog Dating Advice Almost Daily.

So, here we are on Valentine’s Day, and you know for a fact you’re not getting chocolate and flowers (if you’re lucky, maybe you’ll get a card from your Aunt Ina in Albuquerque). You’re ready to meet someone special, but so far, it just hasn’t happened. At this point, you doubt it will ever happen.

Well, think again.

When you’re ready to meet the right man, it’s critical to know what you want in a man. Do you know? I’ll bet you know exactly what you don’t want in a man because you’ve dated it five thousand times. So, get a pen. List those qualities you do not want in a man (dishonest, unreliable, unfaithful, terminal mama’s boy, etc.) on paper.

Now write down exactly what you do want (honest, reliable, faithful, independent, etc.)

This is not hocus-pocus. Don’t be fooled by its simplicity.

It worked for me. My readers know that I once had a pattern of attracting abusive and emotionally distant men, ‘maybe gay guys,’ in addition to well-meaning fellows who had no idea what they wanted. I was one of those people who could never get a relationship off the ground.

But that changed once I sat down and determined what I didn’t want in a man and what I did want. What I did want looked like this:

“I am happily married to a loyal, loving, reliable, successful, fun man.”

For the uninitiated, that’s an affirmation. In my quest to discover why I’d failed at relationships, I came across several books that claimed that affirmations can change lives. I admit I felt rather foolish sitting in my brother’s bedroom writing “I am happily married to a loyal, loving, reliable, successful man” when I’d never dated such person, but truly it changed my life.

Within weeks, I stopped attracting losers, No-Show Joes, and well-meaning commitment phobes. Six months after writing my affirmation, I met my husband. Seventeen years and two children later, I’m still married to him.

Affirmations work.

Now, you can’t just write or speak an affirmation once and expect it to work magic. You’ve got to do it repeatedly every day.

So decide what you want in a man. Write it down. Put together an affirmation. Write it. Speak it out loud while you’re cooking dinner and when you’re in the shower (but, please, not when you’re riding the train to work).

Then watch out: Your affirmation will go to work on changing your beliefs and the negative programming you’ve accumulated over the years. Keep it up, and you will feel a shift inside you. When your insides change,
your outsides will change.

You’ll notice you’re attracting better men. Better yet, you’ll notice you’re attracted to better men. You will date better men. If you want to get married, you will marry the right man.

Go for it.

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Want more Blog-a-thon? Great!
To read posts from the first four days, see links below and enjoy.

To read Day 1 by the Dating Goddess, midlife dating expert click here
To read Day 2 by Alyssa Johnson,relationship after divorce expert  click here
To read Day 3 by Laurie Davis, eFlirt Expert click here
to read Day 4 by SingleMomSeeking, top-rated single mom blogger click here

Dating Over 40: Asking the Hard Questions

Mr friend Terry, author of  How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams has a really good blog posting about asking the hard questions. a woman wrote to her who lives at home and is seeing a guy she claims treats her well. But they have no place to hang out together because she doesn’t know where he lives since he moved out from his ex-girlfriend.

Are you raising your eyebrows?
I am.
So did Terry.

And in a gentle and empowering way, Terry gave this woman sage advice that we both hope she follows.

Read the whole post here to get a good idea of how to raise your standards and really get treated right. There’s no reason to wait and wonder when you can sum up your courage and ask the hard questions. That’s how you learn what you must know to forge a strong bond with the right man.