Dating over 40

When you go to a big event where you don’t know a lot of people, do you find it difficult to keep that happy smile on your face? If you said yes, I know what you mean.

I just attended a 3-day workshop in Florida and people were simply loving it! While much of the event was very good, I have to admit, I didn’t love it all like others seemed to. Most of the time I kept that happy face on so I could appear at my best as I met new folks.

With a room full of 180 attendees, every step I took meant I might be meeting someone new. That’s a lot of smiling and hand shaking. So, when you tell me its hard to attend single events where you don’t know many of the people, I understand, believe me.

How can you move through these events, keep a smile planted on your face and still be true to yourself? Here’s how I maneuvered through the three days to meet as many new folks as possible and still be myself. As a dating coach for women over 40, I want to make your quest for love as easy as possible.

1. I shared my stories and experiences with the new people I was sitting with, but limited my comments more than I would have to good friends. With those close to me I might have made a few funny snide comments. However, in this situation, I refrained as much as possible so no one would get the wrong impression.

2. I simply listened at times and gave myself  a rest, letting someone else talk and share. This was a key resource.

3. I took breaks! There was an evening session and 20-minutes into the event, I realized it was better for me to go upstairs to my room and watch TV. Push yourself, but when you’re tired or feel done, stop. Honor yourself by taking care of yourself. This will keep everyone smiling.

4. When I met someone and we had nothing in common, I said,”Nice meeting you” and moved on. The concept of “Next!” works in networking as well as dating.

5. Even if you have a few moments of discomfort, don’t blow it out of proportion. Keep the picture of the entire event in mind so your take away is from the totality of the event, not just what happened when you talked with a few idiots. (This is a lot like not throwing the baby out with the bath water.)

Meeting a lot of new people is taxing. But it can also be tons of fun! I met some truly wonderful people in that room filled with 180 healers, therapists, coaches, artists, etc.  They weren’t all my style, but overall, I had  a fabulous time which was a very welcomed outcome.

If you can take a step back and look at the big picture, keep that smile on your face most of the time and relax, you can make the most of any event or opportunity to meet men.

The most important thing to keep in mind is this:

You never know who might be your connection to “the one”. All the more reason to smile, be nice and friendly and be the best you can be. Then put our feet up, have a glass of wine and know you made the most of the opportunity.

Photo Credit: Kansir

Dating is a numbers game. With that in mind, you can see what a wise strategy meeting new people really is. If you’ve been reading my blog, you already know how I’ve been emphasizing being more friendly and meeting more people. This MSN article suggests that even meeting new members of the same sex can be a good entre into meetingis more members of the opposite sex. Good point!

This advice is particularly approrpiate for women over 40, and even more so over 50. Why? Because, the longer we live, the more likely it is to experience a natural attrition or loss of friends. People move away, change, leave the friendship , find new friends, etc. There are numberous reason why we lose friends and contacts over time. Making new friends is the best solution to keeping active and maintaining a wide social network.

Right now, open up this link and read this fantastic artilcle which lists a number of ways to build up your social connections. One good connection leads to another they say. I highly recommend it.